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About Me Member Antagonist Danielle15/Female/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 2 Years
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Statistics 220 Deviations
1,571 Comments
4,573 Pageviews

All my fault.

Thu Nov 19, 2009, 5:51 PM
  • Mood: Insecure
  • Listening to: Melissa dn my Dad fighting.
  • Reading: Smack
My family isn't a family. Dinners are quiet, no one speaks for fear of being yelled at.
I do everything wrong.
I'm a bad girl.
I deserve to be punished.
Every day I take my own beatings, along with theirs. I don't feel like eating, i don't feel like doing anything. I just want to sleep, it is an escape, the only one.
Right now I hear them yelling, I hate confrontation. I hate to hear them yelling, because it is my fault. I made them angry. I do everything wrong, I cause the family to fight. Its me.
Daddy those pills don't fucking work.
At dinner I sit quite, while they yell and scold me. I sit there taking the blows, while I pour pounds salt on my food, hoping it will give me a heart attack then and there. I don't want to be here anymore.
And when I cry, I am told to suck it up. I can't show emotion. So I stay away from them. I don't want to come home. This isn't home.
I hate you, all of you, and you all hate me right back.
I don't even have my daddy to talk to now, because I destroyed that.
Mommy, please save me. I hate it here. I'm sick of punishing myself, my skin can't take it, nor can my heart. I hate this, I hate this, I HATE THIS!
I can't do this.

I'm sorry for being a complaining little bitch. I just, I needed to vent. I'm sorry.

deviantID

I am the story of narcissism.
Other than that, I'm not really sure.
I know how I work, yet I have no classification.
I've done everything wrong by putting myself on auto pilot. I've killed my friendships. Murdered my family.
I am hated.
I need to change. I'm trying.
I'm not sure how. I've destroyed the real me. I'm not sure who I am at all.
I am just a pretty face, if you could call it that even.
I am just another girl to all of you.
Sometimes I want to stay that way.
My mind is withering away, with nothing to show for it.
I am what you'd call a "hopeless case"
If you are reading this, do not make an effort to get to know me. My snake charm is the only thing that works with strangers.
I hurt others and blame them.
I will back you into a corner and hate you for it.
I am stupid.
I seek approval in any way I can, though I know I'll never find it.
- Sigh -
I'm not worth the hurt.

Devious Info

  • Current Residence: Minnesota
  • Interests: Music.
  • Personal Quote: I say if the futures been drawn out there's no point in living.

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Comments


:iconvivalalintu:
Thanks for the fave. :]

--
All the nerves of the patients bathe in shock and shame,
cuz I'm the t r i g g e r that'll start this game.
:iconpedroloko:
Thanks to fav! ^^
:iconcaptainchibi:
Thanks for the fave :meow:

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Visit My Gallery: [link]

"If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic."

:liquify: :nieman: :blackice:
:iconkischie:
Thank you for the faves
:tighthug:
:icongong-sor:
heey thanks for the fav....btw you are really cute :D

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Last.fm [link]
:iconlost-in-a-current:
lol, thank you.

--
Give me silence in a screaming crowd.
Award me courage when all is feared.
My pride melts like candlesticks burning buildings.
Bang out sounds of syllables like a paper fan on fire.
(Don't Steal! This is mine!)
:iconlibellchen:
thank you for the fav! :)

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:rose: jeanine
:iconsandra-h:
I'm so thankful for your fav on "Family portrait":thanks:

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/Sandra. :rose:
:iconstrainstrain:
thanks a lot for the fave:D I am glad you liked it. You have a nice gallery too:D

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~Chasing Blue Sky~

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